Lies, Damnable Lies, and Statistics

http://www.thelookingspoon.com/images/general/funny/the_new_study_msm_lie.jpg



http://xkcd.com/882/

SNAP Off Food Stamp Obesity

JAMA has a viewpoint this week "Opportunities to Reduce Childhood Hunger And Obesity" (behind paywall) about the paradox of obesity in Food Stamp Program (SNAP) recipients.

The authors point out the program sucks up about $4,000,000,000 yearly for taxpayer funded soft drinks. I also observe our local Starbucks doing well with my state's program.

Although the article had tidbits pointing to improvements, in the end the bureaucratic solution of more study ("more systematic approach to data collection") was recommended.

Why not use the WIC  rules to define eligible items for food stamps?

No Wonder Some Of My Patients Feel Sick

According to a crossover type study reported in USA Today, subjects had fewer physical and mental heath symptoms when telling fewer lies, and felt worse when lying more. Read the report here.

Weighing The Fa(c)ts

Nurse Dall: "Many of the overweight patients assert: 'Your scale is wrong. My home scale never reads that high!' (often claiming a 10 pound discrepancy)."

 "The normal weight people tell me the office scale is correct."

Stinky Feet

As I gloved to perfom a rectal exam on the 45yo man with rectal bleeding, he said:

"I must apologize for my stinky feet "!

Oregon Medical Methamphetamine Program

ATTENDING PHYSICIAN’S STATEMENT

Oregon Medical Methamphetamine Card Program

Instructions: Please complete all sections of this form in order to comply with the registration requirements of the Oregon Medical Methamphetamine Act OR provide relevant portions of the patient’s medical record containing all information required on this form. This does not constitute a prescription for methamphetamine.

PLEASE TYPE OR PRINT LEGIBLY.

PATIENT INFORMATION

PATIENT NAMES (LAST, ALIAS LAST, FIRST, ALIAS FIRST, M.I.) DATES OF BIRTH:

____________________________________________________

MAILING ADDRESSES: MESSAGE TELEPHONE #:

________________________________________

CITY, STATE AND ZIP CODE

_______________________

PHYSICIAN INFORMATION

PHYSICIAN NAME: TELEPHONE #:

__________________________________

MAILING ADDRESS: CITY, STATE AND ZIP CODE:

__________________________________

PHYSICIAN STATEMENT

Patient’s Debilitating Medical Condition: Check appropriate boxes.

[ ] 1. Malignant unproductive disorder

[ ] 2. Excess Teeth

[ ] 3. Pre-ulcerated Skin

[ ] 4. Positive status for White Trash Virus (WTV) or Acquired Life Deficiency Syndrome

[ ] 5. Agitation due to narcotic refusal

5. A patient with a medical condition or treatment for a medical condition who causes the attending physician any of the following: (check all that apply)

[ ] a. Persistent ED/office visits, including but not limited to visits seeking narcotics

[ ] b. Severe Tenesmus

[ ] c. Believable Threats

[ ] d. Severe agitation

[ ] e. Chronic or Acute Suicidal Ideation

Comments:


I hereby certify that I am a physician duly licensed to practice medicine in Oregon under ORS Chapter 677. I am stuck with the primary responsibility for the care and treatment of the above-named patient. The above-named patient has caused a debilitating medical condition in me, as listed above. Methamphetamine used medically may mitigate the symptoms or effects on me of this patient’s condition.This is not a prescription for the use of medical methamphetamine.



PHYSICIAN’S SIGNATURE: DATE:

MAIL ATTENDING PHYSICIAN’S STATEMENT TO: DHS/OMMP PO Box 14450 APS 2008 Portland, OR 97293-0450

April Fool 2012

The best I've seen:




Medieval Unicorn Cookbook found

http://britishlibrary.typepad.co.uk/digitisedmanuscripts/2012/04/unicorn-cookbook-found-at-the-british-library.html


Adblock was taken over iz now Catblock

http://adblockforchrome.blogspot.co.uk/2012/03/inturdusing-catblock.html


Google Street Roo

http://google-au.blogspot.com.au/2012/04/google-street-roo-exploring-outback-one.html#!/2012/04/google-street-roo-exploring-outback-one.html

Many links to more at http://www.pocket-lint.com/news/45109/april-fools-day-2012-highlights and http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/9178949/April-Fools-Day-todays-best-stories.html#disqus_thread

STAT Refill

Phone call of the morning:

"Can you refill my Viagra? I need it before Noon".

Let Me Rephrase That

Phone call.
Neurosurgeon declines to perform procedure on my alcoholic elderly patient.
I hang up and turn to my staff and say:

Hal Dall, MD: "Dr. X won't operate on Mr. Y because he's a drunk".
Dr. Dall's staffer: "Dr. X is a drunk"?