Thursday, November 19, 2009

Doctish-English Phrase Book: Dialogue 1

This lesson illustrates a conversation using two dialects of Doctish. The physician, Dr. Lucre uses the standard form, while his patient, Mr. Slippery speaks Evadian. (Translation is provided in italics)

Dr. Lucre: Good morning, how are you today? You're here?

Mr. Solvent: I'm fine I'm here

Dr. L: What can I do for you? Can I make this a 99214? I have a Porsche payment due

Mr. S: You told me to come in for a recheck. You have a Porsche payment due

Dr. L: How has your blood pressure been doing? I see your pressure is high today. It's always high

Mr. S: It's always high when I'm in your office. It's always high

Dr. L: Do you check it elsewhere, is it any different? You don't check it

Mr. S: Once in a while. No Here's my list of numbers. I made them up

Dr. L: We talked before about lifestyle modification. I see you've gained weight, have you been exercising? How about salt intake? You'll blow me off again and I don't get paid for talking

Mr. S: Your scales are off, at home I weigh less than last time. I try to watch the salt. I have this script memorized

Dr. L: Any side effects from your medicine? Can I get moderate risk?

Mr. S: Only the price. Didn't buy it

Dr. L: Any new symptoms in any way? Nope, not even limited risk. I need more HPI elements. Mx/Dx options?

Dr. L: Have you had any chest pain, trouble breathing, edema, etc... ROS x2, check

Mr. S: Nope Nope

Dr. L: Any Family Medical History of hypertension? need 1 pfsh, Check

Mr. S: Not yet. Check your notes, idiot! You ask every visit.

Dr. L: Let me check you over [does brief physical exam]. I need 12 bullets, Check

Mr. S: Why'd you hafta check my ears? He's padding the bill

Dr. L: It's a valuable thing to check. I'll get to charge more

Mr. S: Anything else Doc? Anything else?

Dr. L: I want to double your Hypotensin pill. Take your Hypotensin pill

Mr. S: OK, I'll need a new prescription. I tossed the old prescription

Dr. L: Ok, here you go. I want to recheck you in 3 months. Same same in 3 months.

Mr. S: Ok, 3 months. Same same in 3 months.

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